> Im fine, Im fine, really, Im okay. Got this
> uncontrollable twitch in my right cheek, but
> otherwise, Im amazingly cool. Maybe its because of
> this PND Ive got strapped to my back.
I believe you, of course. Still, my intuition tells me you may be a tad upset.
Nuking Los Angeles may sound like a really neat idea right now, but I have a feeling you'll regret it. Rumor has it Mann has booked a flight to Miami this weekend. I'm assuming he was your main target. Mann will be in South Beach tomorrow morning for a brainstorming session on a new flick. Trust me, you don't want to know which one.
I have another thought. I normally do not offer these services, but since it's you I'll make an exception. Im half Colombian. Think about that for a second.
There are a lot of people in Miami who would like nothing more than to forget that Miami Vice ever happened. You are looking at one of them. I could set you up in a quiet room at The Delano on Collins Avenue under the name Jose Jimenez. My contacts say Mann will be having dinner tomorrow night at the hotel's restaurant, The Blue Door. My paisas and I could arrange everything. You just give me the word. If the Colombians cant help you, there's a large group of Cubans in the Everglades that are just itching for a fight.
You'll have to ditch the El Camino when you get to Miami. I'll have a black Jag waiting for you, so you'll =blend= in with the locals.
Another interesting development - Faith Hill called me today. How do I know her? Long story. Anyway, she was pretty upset. Says she hasn't been feeling right since those Joy of Cola commercials started. You know that hip short haircut shes wearing now? It wasn't a fashion statement. Just a way to cover up the hair she chopped off after spending 3 days on the set of the latest Pepsi commercial.
She wants to help. She NEEDS to help. Faith assured me that she could take Hallie Kate Eisenberg out of the picture (so to speak) until all this blows over. I made Faith promise she would baby sit her for an extended period of time. No harm will come to her. The only torture she'll endure involves a funnel and a liter bottle of Coca Cola. Faith's idea.
If Mann or Eisenberg are not on the set on Monday, maybe production will stop. At the very least it will be interrupted long enough for you to come up with something else.
After the Miami thing, you can lay low at my cottage in the mountains of Mentone, Alabama. Its a very back to basics house, but I'm sure you'll feel right at home there. People talk funny, drink homemade alcohol out of jugs and the place is surrounded by pine trees. Any supplies you need can be found at the local gas station. Ammo is next to the Moon Pies.
God speed,
Susan